Pole Dancing Grans

THESE grans have given up tea and cakes for something much healthier and more exciting.

It used to be a young woman’s game, but now the over-fifties are limbering up to try their luck at pole dancing.

Here we meet three older ladies who’ve given the fun fitness craze a whirl.

THE SUPER GRAN

Joan Gallagher, 74, is a volunteer from Cambridge.

Poking out my tongue in concentration, I eyed up the challenge in front of me.

Beads of sweat quivered on my wrinkled brow and my leathered hands trembled in anticipation.

I wasn’t trying to solve a tricky Sudoko or perfect my cake for the parish hall’s competition.

I was going to a pole-dancing class.

Thankfully at the first class I managed to stalk around the pole, trying to be sexy in my Reebok Classics, while stopping my shorts creeping up my bum.

“That’s great,” my teacher said. “Now it’s time for your first move.”

I gulped as I watched her flick one leg around the pole, then twirl her body around effortlessly.

She looked so sexy. I had to get my ageing body to do the same.

Tackling my legs first, I kicked them up on to the pole.

Confidence surged through me.

But instead of twirling around, I was holding on so tight, my arms got stuck and I was trapped against the pole like a confused monkey.

Seconds later, my arms caved in and I slid to the floor in a heap.

“Ouch,” I mumbled, chuckling.

I tried pole dancing once more, but after that, I gave it up.

Even though I’m a super gran of four and fit and healthy, I didn’t have the upper arm strength to spin myself around, let alone hang upside down off the pole.

Poled over ... Cathy

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THE GLAM GRANNY

Cathy Simmonds, 62, is a shop assistant from Worthing, West Sussex.

The pretty blonde ran at the pole.

Gripping it tightly, she span around at super speed, flicking herself upside down, her toned legs outstretched.

Shimmying in time to the dance beat, she expertly twirled.

“Wow,” I mouthed, enthralled, my eyes following every swoop.

My youngest daughter, Emma, 29, had just performed a pole-dancing routine as part of her fitness class.

“We’ll start off slowly,” she grinned, sliding down the pole and finishing with a foxy flourish.

Emma’s been dancing since she was old enough to stand, doing ballet, tap and modern dance.

‘ Soon, I was hooking my leg around the pole and twirling. Sometimes, I trip over my own feet, but the bruises soon heal ’

As she got older, she tried out every kind of dance genre, until she taught herself how to pole dance four years ago.

She saw a gap in the market and decided to set up classes.

A few years ago, she roped me into trying out the sexy sport.

But I was a grandma to be and mother of three in my sixties, who enjoyed a cup of tea at the end of the day.

“Surely I couldn’t throw myself around a pole?” I thought.

But Emma insisted. And she was a great teacher, so I went to a class.

She showed me the basic moves, strutting next to me in her trendy leg warmers and skimpy hot pants.

Soon, I was hooking my leg around the pole and twirling.

Sometimes, I trip over my own feet, but the bruises soon heal.

My hubby, Mick, 61, thinks my hobby’s great, even though he’s yet to see me in action.

I’m also a proud grandma to three-month-old Skye, my eldest daughter’s baby girl.

When she’s older, I hope she’ll think her pole-dancing gran is cool.

Fabulous at fifty ... Jan

Jan Masey, 52, is a civil servant from Dorset.

My friend raised her eyebrows as she looked me up and down.

“You’re doing pole dancing?” she asked, aghast. “At your age?”

I nodded, feeling my cheeks flush.

But then I gazed down at my not- so-mummy tummy, toned arms and tight thighs and I couldn’t help but smile.

“Yes, I’m a pole-dancing gran and I’m proud,” I declared.

I took up the provocative pastime in April this year.

I’d been single for seven months after my husband of 31 years and I had split up.

I’d been looking to boost my confidence and fitness.

‘ I soon mastered the fireman spin, which involves lifting yourself high on the pole with just your arms ’

One night, I was on the Internet when I saw an advert: No thongs required – anyone, any age, any size can pole dance.

I’d always thought pole dancing was sleazy, but this looked really glam.

Why shouldn’t I do something exciting?

Impulsively, I’d signed up for a course of classes, excitement bubbling in my tummy.

At my first class, held at Polz Apart Dance School, I was so nervous, giggling with the other girls.

The teacher, Zea, was kind and patient, so I quickly got into the swing of pole dancing and the basic moves.

I soon mastered the fireman spin, which involves lifting yourself high on the pole with just your arms.

We did sexy routines, bumping and grinding our way through Mercy by Duffy.

As a gran of three – with another on the way – and a mum of two, I’ve never felt sexier.

I walk with my head held high and my hips swaying from side to side.

When I’m out with my friends, the confidence that comes from pole dancing bubbles inside me.

I even have a car bumper sticker saying: I love pole dancing.

I’d recommend it to ladies of any age.

Maybe one day, I’ll meet a man who can keep up!

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Restaurateur 'beaten up' by 83-year-old nuns

Nuns - not as wholesome as you think

An Italian man has claimed he was beaten up by two 83-year-old nuns and a priest over a restaurant ownership row.
Aniello Esposito, 49, said he turned up to his restaurant in Rutino, Campania, to find the three holy people smashing furniture and crockery.

When he tried to stop them the priest struck him with a chair and the elderly ladies kicked him on the ground.


He was taken to the hospital with bruises on his neck and stomach.

The mother superior of the convent said the nuns had been removing furniture because the convent owned the property and Esposito was in illegal possession.

A lawyer for the nuns said: 'The nuns and the priest arrived to find a wall had been knocked down and seating installed. I don't know how this man was hurt, but the two nuns are 83 and did not cause any injury.'

Esposito said the convent was angry because he was giving out receipts when they wanted the business run 'under the table'.

http://www.metro.co.uk/news/world/article.html?Restaurateur_beaten_up_by_83-year-old_nuns&in_article_id=386590&in_page_id=64

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Man rescued on Train

A passenger on a French train had to be rescued by firemen after having his arm sucked down the on-board toilet.

The 26-year-old victim was trapped when he tried to fish out his mobile phone, which had fallen into the toilet bowl, and fell foul of the suction system.

The high-speed TGV train had to stop for two hours while firemen cut through the train's pipework.

The man was carried away by emergency services, with the toilet still attached to his arm.

"He came out on a stretcher, with his hand still jammed in the toilet bowl, which they had to saw clean off," said Benoit Gigou, a witness to the man's plight.

The incident happened on Sunday evening, aboard a train travelling in western France between La Rochelle and Paris.

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Even the Police lie at times

This is a clipping from a newspaper, unfortunately the source is not listed so apologies

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