Slow Service

All we wanted was our fries

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Thingd I Would Like To Hear Just Once

From my auto mechanic:

"That part is much less expensive than I thought."
"I've never seen anyone maintain his car as well as you do."
"You could get that done more cheaply at the garage down the street."
"It was just a loose wire. No charge."

From my son's preschool teacher:

"Everyone misbehaved today except Michael."
"Michael traded his candy bar for carrot sticks."
"I wish we had 20 Michaels."

From a store clerk:

"The computerized cash register is down. I'll just add up your purchases with a pencil and paper."
"I'll take a break after I finish waiting on these customers."
"We're sorry we sold you defective merchandise. We'll pick it up at your home and bring you a new one or give you a complete refund, whichever you prefer."

From my doctor:

"Of course I'll come by your house to check on you."
"Give me a call at home over the weekend if you're not feeling better."
"Sure, come on by this afternoon, we'll work you in."
"I'll call ahead and let them know the most you will pay for that test."
"Here, take these samples."
"Don't worry about it, there's no charge for that."
"I recommend you get a second opinion."

From a contractor:

"Whoever worked on this before sure knew what he was doing."
"I think I came in a little high on that estimate."

From my dentist:

"I think you're flossing too much."
"I won't ask you any questions until I take the pick out of your mouth."

From a restaurant server:

"I think it's presumptuous for a waiter to volunteer his name, but since you ask, it's Tim."
"I was slow and inattentive. I cannot accept any tip."

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Restaurateur 'beaten up' by 83-year-old nuns

Nuns - not as wholesome as you think

An Italian man has claimed he was beaten up by two 83-year-old nuns and a priest over a restaurant ownership row.
Aniello Esposito, 49, said he turned up to his restaurant in Rutino, Campania, to find the three holy people smashing furniture and crockery.

When he tried to stop them the priest struck him with a chair and the elderly ladies kicked him on the ground.


He was taken to the hospital with bruises on his neck and stomach.

The mother superior of the convent said the nuns had been removing furniture because the convent owned the property and Esposito was in illegal possession.

A lawyer for the nuns said: 'The nuns and the priest arrived to find a wall had been knocked down and seating installed. I don't know how this man was hurt, but the two nuns are 83 and did not cause any injury.'

Esposito said the convent was angry because he was giving out receipts when they wanted the business run 'under the table'.

http://www.metro.co.uk/news/world/article.html?Restaurateur_beaten_up_by_83-year-old_nuns&in_article_id=386590&in_page_id=64

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